Amanda's fall tv review: part 3

Ah, "Survivor." We've been together a long time. For over seven years, you've dominated my Thursday television-watching nights. On my first date with Greg, I told him he was lucky I was there, because "Survivor" was on that night. I distinctly remember sitting in the parking lot of the restaurant where I was meeting this blind date, on the phone with my mother, asking her to tape the show for me (in ye olden days before TiVo).

Like any long-term relationship, we've had our highs and lows. I would be happy to point out specific seasons and which ones I liked the best and least, but Jane only let me have about four hours of sleep last night, and I'm wrecked. Anywho, all I can say is - Colby. Colby was a highlight. I think he was in Australia. I met him once. He's - how can I say it - dazzling. It's really the only word.

Anyway, I fear that this season, in my friend Todd's words, will be boring. Last night's season premiere didn't much hold my attention - again, lack of sleep might have been the cause, as I was watching it at 2 a.m. I love the setting. This season takes place in China, and I believe this is the first U.S. show ever to be filmed entirely in China. Despite my lack of appreciation for Chinese food, the country itself looks beautiful. Their conditions, I fear, will be brutal. One hint is that they've already been provided with fire and rice, which are things they usually have to fight for. This leads me to believe that their campsites must be very lacking in even the most basic of resources. (In fact, I think I read that in an interview with my boyfriend, Jeff Probst).

A couple of things stood out to me last night. One, I could not, for the life of me, really understand a word that Chicken was saying. He's from the deep South, or so it seems (I am so tired right now I'm not even doing my research on CBS.com), and every word that came out of his mouth seemed garbled. And while I have no clue what he was saying, so therefore no clue as to whether he would have been a good player, I felt bad when he got kicked off. I thought that wrestler chick should have gone.

I also thought it was pretty funny when Jean-Robert (very fancy names this season!) accused Todd (yeah, Todd! There's a player named after you this season! Me too!) of lying about the fact that he's a flight attendant. See, Jean-Robert is a professional poker player, and he can tell when people are being devious. He's really got his finger on the pulse of the other players. Except that Todd is a fight attendant. And all he could do was plead with Jean-Robert not to go around and tell everyone he's devious. Because, well, he's not. At least so far.

Admittedly, the first couple of episodes of "Survivor" are usually throwaways. You can never tell who's who, and which tribe is which. It doesn't really get interesting until it's whittled down to a manageable number of people. And I'll be there, no matter what, especially considering this is my longest TV relationship ever. Just don't break my heart, "Survivor."