Friday, October 26, 2007

I will survive

Sigh.

Just got home a little while ago from my first day-and-a-half at work. No, I didn't stomp out halfway through today in a emotional hissy fit - I am working half days on Fridays for the rest of this calendar year, in an attempt to use up some time off I have saved. That, plus working from home on Tuesdays, will help make this transition easier.

Yesterday was truly one of the worst days of my life. I have not been such an emotional basketcase in years - I felt like my guts were being ripped out when I had to leave Jane at daycare. I'm not even trying to be melodramatic here - it was physically painful. Work was a good distraction - it was great to see everyone again, and catch up on the gossip, and whatnot. But all I wanted to do was be with my baby. I made it until 4 p.m., and then I bolted off to pick her up. I know it will get easier, and I maintain that my workplace is about the best place to return to, if you have to go back to work full-time. The flexibility and understanding is unmatched.

Her "InfantGram" - the daily sheet that lets me know how her mood was, what she ate, her diaper situation, etc - told me that she had a great day yesterday, and her teacher said the same. Jane was nothing but pleasant for them. Sure, the witching hour(s) kicked off as soon as we got home, which is typical from about 5 p.m. to 8 p.m. in our house. But I was glad that she had such a good day. I just wished I was with her.

This afternoon when I went to pick her up, she was crying in her assigned crib. I had to reassure myself that Jane cries plenty when she's at home, that it's not an indication of abuse or neglect or anything. Still, I was happy to rescue her and bring her home, and now I get to spend the next two whole days with her. I have always appreciated my time with her, but now that it's more limited, I appreciate it even more.

I also appreciated the fact that she saved her major ass-plosion that she's been working on by not pooping for the past two days for daycare. They had to change her whole outfit! Yeesh.

Have a great weekend!

2 comments:

Alan said...

Sorry you had a rough day and a half. It will get better!

Funny you should mention stomping "out halfway through today in a emotional hissy fit" That was my day! :)

lgaumond said...

Nice, daycare earned it's monthly fee with that changing! I feel pain in my chest reading about how you feel leaving beautiful Miss Jane and returning to stinky work. I'm sorry, I hope it works itself into an easy routine soon. Either that or you win the lotto and can stay home with her full-time.