First of all, let me just say that I am thoroughly ashamed that I watch "The Bachelor." It is such a stupid show - between the rose ceremonies and group dates and fantasy suites and what not, it is truly the cheesiest of all shows that I watch. Even for a reality TV fan like myself, it is humiliating to admit that this is on my list of shows to TiVo.
Nevertheless, there I was last night, watching the big two-hour finale. Going in, I knew I had picked the wrong girl. I always do. The Bachelors never pick the girl I want them to, so last night, I knew that it would be Jen who would get the final rose, not Sadie. And sure enough, I was right.
Why Jen, Lorenzo? Why Jen? Although she is a teacher, she really seemed kind of empty in the head, ya know? I had hopes for you, Lorenzo. You didn't seem like a total loser. You seemed to kind of hate the whole awkward Bachelor experience. I thought maybe YOU would be the one to choose the girl that I liked. But, alas for Sadie and me, Jen was the one you chose to be your princess.