from "me" to "mom"

Let me preface this by saying I think it's really cool that I'm a mom now. In fact, it's weird to even type it -I still can't really believe it. However....it's amazing, truly amazing, how this little 8 (almost 9) pounder takes up every single drop of energy I have, and then some. I'm a slave to her every whim and need. She says "jump," I say, "how high?". As it turns out, I am having a little trouble letting go of the idea of a planned out, organized life. I'm a planner - in the olden days (prior to July 23), I had my life planned out for months at a time, everything carefully written out in my calendar. These days, everything is spur-of-the-moment, depending on whether Lady Jane is eating, sleeping, pooping or otherwise.

We are going through a fun phase right now where we are trying to adjust her eating schedule, as in, shorten her feedings. This has been relentlessly difficult and has resulted in no small amount of crying (on everyone's part). One thing that distracts Jane from wanting to eat for the zillionth hour in a row is riding in her stroller - that tends to knock her out. So this morning, she dozed for a minute, and just about the second her eyes shut, I had her in the car, stroller in the trunk, and we were headed for West Hartford Center. Sure, I hadn't known I was going out even five minutes earlier, but off we went, me in my ponytail, stained t-shirt and delightfully kicky mesh shorts that have become my summer uniform.

I have to say, although our trips out into the world are very spontaneous and sometimes short-lived, it's awesome to get out. We have had some really glorious weather and it's so nice to walk around the Center with her (as long as she's quiet). As it turns out, the Center is pretty packed on a weekday morning. Turns out, everyone in West Hartford doesn't work - they hang out at Starbucks instead.

But what was I saying before? Oh yeah. With Jane on my lap or in my arms at least 80% of my day, a trip to the bathroom is tending to feel like a field trip. Almost every meal I have is eaten with one hand, because she's in the other. Many times I'm at the computer, she's with me too. Showers are taken at a record pace because, like clockwork, she'll wake up as I'm trying to get ready for the day. Everything that seemed so simple (and was so simple) before has become difficult, and sometimes impossible, to achieve during the day.

Good thing she's so cute.