Wednesday, July 26, 2006

make new friends, but keep the old

Oprah, you've done pissed me off. Here's why:

"I understand why people think we're gay," she said. "There isn't a definition in our culture for this kind of bond between women. So I get why people have to label it — how can you be this close without it being sexual?"

This is the now-famed quote from Oprah, from an interview in her magazine, O, about her friendship with former Hartford-ite, Gayle King. Now, Oprah and Gayle have been bragging about their friendship - the bestity best best best friendship in the UNIVERSE - for a long time. And I think we can all recognize that having Oprah as a best friend puts Gayle in a pretty sweet position. And I'm not even doubting their friendship - they've been buddies for a really long time, long before one of them rocketed to global fame and became one of the richest people in the world.

But that quote drives me nuts! Because, yes, there is a definition in our culture for that kind of bond between women, Oprah - it's called "friendship." You don't own friendship. You didn't create it. Women have been close, in a non-sexual way, through the ages. It didn't start with you and Gayle.

And why do they have to make such a production out of it? I've had the same best friend for 25 years. We don't run around talking about it all the time. I think I'm lucky to still be friends with someone who I played Barbies with, struggled through our nerdy years with, went to college with, celebrated each other's weddings with, and who is now about to have her third child. We have supported each other through individual struggles, and have had many, many, many good times. She is the funniest person I know. But do we run around with our "best friends" necklaces and talk about how great we are because we are friends? No. I think I just consider myself lucky to have not only her, but a very great group of close friends, and that's that. No need to slap it on the cover of a magazine (not that anyone would care about my life).

I guess it just irks me that Oprah has become possessive about the whole concept of friendship now. Doesn't that woman have enough?

1 comment:

lgaumond said...

Sometimes I love Oprah, sometimes she bugs the crap out of me.